This post is choked out during sex videopart ofHard Refresh, a soothing weekly column where we try to cleanse your brain of whatever terrible thing you just witnessed on Twitter.
The world has thousands of Aretha Franklin and Judy Garland queens. It has only one backpacking queen: Pattie Gonia.
Late last week, Pattie Gonia posted a video of herself hiking mountains all while in death-defyingly tall and skinny boots.
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The post quickly earned over 13,500 views on Instagram. That's impressive, given that this is Pattie Gonia's first post.
These boots are made for crushing skulls, not climbing mountains. Look at this queen werk (then please encourage her to wear flats, this is a safety hazard).
The post is something of a mystery. Pattie Gonia doesn't seem to have an internet presence outside of this single video -- not on Twitter, not on Facebook, not on YouTube.
She only follows one person on Instagram -- Beyoncé.
I know I'm not alone in wanting Pattie Gonia to do more. How often do we see queens rocking earth tones? The lesbian in me is so pleased. And she's not in some shitty club, she's in nature. She probably got there in a Subaru. I have nothing but respect for a lady who struts while downing Cheetos.
I wish they were Puffed Cheetos, not Crunchy, but you can't have it all.
Thanks, Pattie Gonia, for your backpacking realness. May other queens follow your lead and werk.
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